i was at the concert in new jersey, and i have finally recovered enough to sit down and type out my thoughts and experience. after a 9 hour car ride there and back from north carolina (18 hours total) and the concert itself, i am EXHAUSTED. i am only 22 years old (i’m a new v.i.p), but i have hypermobile ehlers-danlos syndrome and POTS and all of the fun stuff that comes with that, and i am still in sooooo much pain. the tendons behind my knees and the ligaments under my kneecaps have been ❄︎ing me since the show! i guess i danced a little too hard. anyone else in excruciating pain? i want to know if them three are in as much pain as i am after a show - i know at least jiyong has to be because he looks to be hypermobile too. he also seems POTSie to me - i am no doctor, but that is my guess just based on observation! funnily enough, i was actually in new jersey the weekend before for another concert that my parents and brother were going to. i didn’t go, but i went along for the ride. what’s even weirder is that the same thing happened last year - my family and i were up in jersey for one of their concerts (again, i didn’t go but i was there for the trip), and jiyong’s concert was the next week in newark, so we had to take the trip up to jersey two weekends in a row. i swear he knows when i’m going to be in jersey and makes his concert the week after i’m there! i wanted to share my outfit with you v.i.p’s because i am so proud of it and i worked really hard on it. i know daesung said the dress code was “traffic light,” but i just didn’t feel inspired by it. i couldn’t think of an outfit for the longest time! i then remembered that the name of the tour is “cosmos,” and my personal style is very celestial, witchy, and space-themed, so i decided to become the cosmos! i bedazzled the jeans myself, which took me two w❄︎ weeks and HOURS of breathing in toxic glue fumes. all of the constellations are real constellations - see if you can name them all! also, about half of them have a meaning as they have a direct tie to the members. see if you can figure that out too! on the back pockets i did the piano key design and the cosmos logo. unfortunately, i don’t have any other pictures of me in my outfit other than one mirror selfie after the show because we were waiting in the merch lines before the show and didn’t have time to take pictures. without further ado, please enjoy my cosmos-themed outfit! not pictured is my moon belt that broke as soon as i sat down at the venue lol speaking of merch lines, those lines were INSANE. unfortunately, i wasn’t able to get a lightstick (my poor mother tried so hard :( ), and i’m a little sad, but i still had fun without one. my mom waited in several merch lines, and in every single one, they announced that they ran out when she was 2 or 3 rows away. on her way up to the seats, she asked every single stand that she passed, and they said that they were out as well. she didn’t even get to her seat until just before the solo segments started! the merch line on the first tier level was CRAZY - we walked halfway around the stadium just to find the end! it went past the other merch stand on that level! obviously, we didn’t wait on that line, but still. that was probably the worst merch experience i’ve ever had. a lot of the stands only had two employees working, and for a sold out show at metlife, it definitely wasn’t enough! i still got a tour t-shirt though, so i’m happy about that. i guess i’ll have to buy a lightstick at a marked up price (and pay shipping) from a k-pop store or something! i was all the way up in the nosebleeds in section 339, but don’t let that fool you, we still had a lot of fun! i could barely afford those tickets as they were over $100 a seat. someone had to hold it down in the 300 level though! we were singing, dancing, screaming, etc. the w❄︎ time! i want to give a shout out to the girls in section 339, row 17, seats 5 and 6 (the girls right next to me) - we didn’t say a single word to each other, but you guys were so fun! i feel like we had an unspoken understanding to sing and dance hard af. if somehow you guys see this, you passed the vibe check! also, shoutout to the girls right in front of me - section 339, row 16, seats 3 and 4 i’m assuming? you guys were cute and i saw you doing all of the choreo to the songs. you guys were ❄︎ing it! overall, the concert was AMAZING and i had a great time! although some things didn’t go the way i wanted, i still had so much fun! it was my first time seeing bigbang as well as my first time seeing dae and bae live (i saw ji last year in newark!) and they put on such a great performance and they looked like they were having so much fun! i will say that the post-concert depression is REAL. i am so sad that it’s over! all that’s left are the memories and the videos and pictures. it’s all i can think about! i wish i was still there! edit: i love that b.stage censored the words "k!ll!ng" and "wh0l3" lol